and life goes on

So many changes. Each one that I have to make here, makes it burn all over again. But it has to be done and this was one of the things I'd forgotten to fix, change or do.

I'm not sure what else to say here, I'm putting my best food forward and doing my damnedest not to dwell. I know you'll never read this post or even this blog again, so maybe it's an opportune time to say fuck you for breaking my heart. Perhaps I should say, thanks for ripping away my very best friend, when you walked away; too? 16 days later and the wound is still pretty fresh. I still hurt, I'm still angry and I can definitely relate to a dog that's just been dropped off at a humane society. The people are good to me, the food's different, there's lots of visitors that come by and look at me.... but I'm sitting there blinking wondering what happened and where the hell my owner went. Once in awhile someone pets me and it eases the heartache and fear. Yeop...... I'm definitely feeling like that dog.

I'm trying hard to move forward, trying hard to make good impressions because anything less would disrespect and dishonor the two years you gave me. I also think giving you any further thought then that.... might be more then you deserve. It's all pretty complex. Being dumped sucks and sometimes.. well sometimes..... fuck you because I wish I didn't love you.